Imposter Syndrome: Chapter 1, Part 1

The Red Light in the Night.

Created with Midjourney.

Imposter Syndrome is my fourth novel. It’s a spooky young adult mystery set in the weird town of Shady Springs, where nothing’s ever quite what it seems. Over the coming weeks, I’ll be sharing serialised instalments of the story exclusively on Substack. If you like it, consider upgrading to a paid subscription to help support my fiction writing. Annual subscribers will get a free physical copy of the novel when it’s published in full.

---

Chapter One: The Red Light in the Night

     Theo couldn’t believe where the bus left him.

     This can’t be right, he thought, squinting up the deserted stretch of road towards the bend. The bus had been there a second ago and now it was gone, vanished beyond the trees; he could still hear the engine, fading fast.

     “This can’t be right,” he repeated, aloud this time. The tall pines behind him rustled in reply.

     He jimmied his phone from his pocket and scrolled to his Mom’s cell. Her face, round and bespectacled and rosy-cheeked, flashed up on the screen as the number dialed. Somewhere overhead, a bird squawked and it sounded like laughter.

     “Come on, come on,” he muttered as the dial tone buzzed in his ear.

     Brrrrrrr. Brrrrrrr.

     “Come on!”

     Brrrrr-click. “Theo? What’s wrong?”

     “Mom!” He hadn’t meant to sound desperate but it came out anyway. “The stupid bus dumped me in the middle of nowhere!”

     “Oh, so you’re there now?”

     “There?” he exclaimed, his voice echoing up and down the empty road between the lines of trees. “I’m not there, Mom. I’m… I’m nowhere at all!”

     He heard her sigh. “You must be somewhere, son.”

     “I’m - ”

     “What did the driver say?”

     “He, um…”

     Theo had been asleep when the bus hissed to a stop. The old woman sitting next to him had tapped his shoulder and said “I think this is you, dear”, and pointed at the paper ticket still clutched loosely in his hand. She’d smiled in a kind way but her teeth were mustard-colored and she smelled like mothballs mixed with cinnamon, and Theo was glad to get up from his seat. He’d staggered to the front of the bus on stiff legs, grabbing his bag from the overhead bin along the way. It’d landed on his head when he pulled it down and someone further back in the bus snickered.

     “Your stop, kid,” said the driver. The door swooshed open.

     Theo peered out through the window and saw nothing but forest. “Here?”

     “Yup.”

     “But - ”

     “Off you go.”

     Ten seconds later, he found himself standing next to a wonky wooden sign reading ‘Bus Stop’ as his only mode of transport for the last three hours rumbled away, kicking up dust from the verge. And just like that, he was alone. Just him, the trees and the bag at his feet.

     “He said this was my stop,” Theo said into the phone.

     “There you go, then.”

     “Mom, this is bogus.”

     “Theo…”

     “This is bogus, Mom! I didn’t want to come here, you know. I didn’t need to come here.”

     “It’ll be good for you, sweetie.”

     “No it won’t.” He kicked at a pebble, sent it skittering across the asphalt.

     “We talked about this,” his mom continued brightly, as though she didn’t hear him. “It’ll be good for you to see your Aunt and Uncle, and your cousins. They haven’t seen you in years.”

     “I don’t care.”

     “Theo.” There was a warning tone in her voice now; he kicked at another pebble, scuffing the dirt next to it instead. “Your father and I agreed this was best for you, and you agreed with us.”

     “I know, but - ”

     “No buts.”

     She stopped, waiting. Theo tried to resist but couldn’t help himself. “You said butts.” He practically heard her smile on the other end of the line. It was an old joke, but it was theirs.

     “Do this for us, Theo, ok?” she said, the edge gone now. “Your father and I won’t get a real family vacation this year, with work and everything. And your little brother’s still too young to travel much. One of us may as well have a holiday.”

     “You couldn’t have sent me to Disney World or something?”

     “Theo.”

     He sighed, feigning exasperation. “Fiiiiine. I’ll go see them. But I still think the bus driver left me here to get eaten by bears.”

     “Just play dead when they come, ok?”

     “Funny, Mom.” Wait, are there bears? “What am I supposed to do now, though?”

     “Someone will be along soon.”

     “Who…?” he started.

     Before he could finish, the biggest station wagon he’d ever seen came roaring round the bend, tires squealing and music blaring.

     “Never mind,” said Theo.

---

     The station wagon screeched to a halt a yard from where he stood, billowing dust around his feet. Theo coughed and screwed up his nose, waving it away. He caught a glimpse of himself reflected in the passenger side window - tousled dark hair, light brown skin, bony shoulders - before the glass rolled down and heavy rock music flooded out. An older girl leaned across from the driver’s side, dipping her sunglasses to look at him. She said something but he missed it.

     “What?”

     He saw her roll her eyes. She twisted the dial on the car radio and the thumping music dropped in volume.

     “Theodore Islander?”

     “Um… I guess, but - ”

     “Are you Theo Islander? Like, my little cousin Theo?”

     “Yeah, I - ”

     “Then get in.”

     She straightened up again. Flustered, Theo pulled open the door and bundled himself inside. He barely got the door closed before the car lurched away from the bus stop. If his bag hadn’t been on his lap, he might have face-planted into the dash.

     “Wait, let me get my - ow!”

     His head banged off the door window as the station wagon swung a hard U-turn, briefly tilted into the verge, then angled back onto the road again. They sped past the bus stop, going the other way.

     “Hey, slow down!” he cried, scrambling to fasten his seatbelt.

     “What?” said the girl, dialing up the music again.

     Theo reached over and turned it down. The girl made a frustrated uck sound but didn’t try to stop him.

     “You’re… are you Tiffany?” he asked, catching his breath.

     “What d’you think?”

     “Well, I hope you are,” he said. “Otherwise I just got into a car with some stranger.”

---

---

She chuckled, and he knew it was her. Tiffany Oakwood, his older cousin by - he thought hard - four years? He hadn’t seen her in a long time and she looked… different. For one thing, her mousy brown hair had been dyed dark pink; for another, there was a shiny stud ring in her nose that definitely hadn’t been there before. Or had it? Maybe he didn’t remember her quite as well as he thought. One thing he did remember, though, was how she always called him -

     “Theodore,” she said as they turned another bend in the road, much too fast, “how old are you now? Nine? Nine-and-three-quarters?”

     “I’m thirteen.”

     “No you’re not.”

     “I am!” 

     “So you and Alex are the same age?”

     “No,” he said, thinking hard again. “We’re in the same grade, but she’s almost a full year younger than me.”

     “So she’s, what, twelve?”

     “She’s your sister, you should know!”

     Tiffany shrugged. She wore a blue tank top and her pale shoulders were pink with sunburn. “Relax, Theodore.”

     “Stop calling me that,” he said crossly, arms wrapped around his bag. “You know it’s Theo.”

     “Why do you think I keep doing it?” she replied, grinning.

     They sped on. Green trees blurred past on either side of the road. The station wagon bounced too much and Tiffany turned every corner too fast, and after a few minutes, Theo began to feel queasy.

     “How much further?” he said.

     “Nearly there,” said Tiffany. “In fact…”

     She took an abrupt right turn and Theo’s stomach lurched to the left. He caught sight of a sign reading ‘Shady Springs 1 mile’, and then they were on a new, narrower road.

     “You live in Shady Springs?” said Theo. He already knew the answer but wanted to distract himself from his topsy-turvy stomach.

     Tiffany sighed. “Yup, Shady Springs. The town with the weirdest name in America.”

     “I’ve heard worse,” Theo said.

     “No you haven’t.” She glanced at him. “You look a lot older, you know. Than last time I saw you.”

     “So do you. What’re you now, twenty-five?”

     She laughed, sort of scoffing. “I’m seventeen, you dweebus.”

     The trees on either side of the road started to thin. After a few minutes, they began to give way to fields, then houses. Finally, they passed a billboard sign reading ‘Welcome to Shady Springs. Please drive carefully” and Tiffany eased off the accelerator. The road dipped down to the left, and then they were in the town itself.

     Theo lived in the city. He was used to bright lights, noisy traffic, people rushing everywhere they went. Even in the suburbs, life seemed hurried and no-one had any time to spare. But suddenly, he found himself on the Main Street of a quiet town with hardly any cars on the road. Families strolled along the sidewalks, peering in through store windows, adults holding their children’s hands or their dog’s leashes. People smiled and waved to one another, stopping to chat and laugh and tilt their faces to the bright blue sky overhead. Theo saw a group of kids his own age weaving down the street on skateboards; one of them caught his eye as the big station wagon rumbled by.

     “So, this is Shady Springs,” said Tiffany, her arm hanging nonchalantly out the window. “Aaaand… there it goes.”

     They turned off Main Street and started uphill, and within seconds, the stores and banks and churches became houses, and then fields, and then they were driving between trees again.

     “It’s… nice,” Theo said.

     “Small is the word you’re looking for,” said Tiffany. “This town has one pizza place. One! Can you believe that? And guess who works there?”

     “Um… you?”

     “Me! Three nights a week and sometimes on a Saturday, serving pies to the good folks of Shady Springs. I don’t even like pizza that much. Not anymore, anyway.”

     Theo did like pizza, and his stomach suddenly went from feeling sickly to empty. He hadn’t eaten since lunchtime and that’d been hours ago. He hoped it’d soon be dinner time at the Oakwoods’. They’re going to serve meatloaf or something, aren’t they?

     As if reading his thoughts, Tiffany said, “We’re here - I think dinner’s about ready, if you’re hungry. Mom will make you eat it either way.” They turned off onto a steeper lane. The station wagon bounced and creaked on its suspension as it climbed the hill, and for a moment or two, Theo thought they were going to roll right back down. And then the lane leveled out, and they were there.

     The Oakwoods’ home wasn’t especially big as far as country houses go but to Theo, who spent most of his life in tightly-packed city suburbs, it seemed huge: a two-storey wooden building with an open porch across the front, a red-brick chimney stack on one side, and dark green ivy snaking up the walls. The garden surrounding it was neat and filled with flowers. It certainly wasn’t a new house - the flaking white paint on the walls and cracks in the asphalt driveway made that clear enough - but it seemed to say “Welcome home!” as they pulled up in front of it.

     But it’s not home, is it?

     “Here we are, Theodore,” said Tiffany, switching off the engine. “Hotel Oakwood.”

     Theo opened his door and at the same moment, the screen door of the house swung outward and a woman stepped onto the porch. She was dark-haired and rosy-cheeked, and she beamed at him as he clambered out of the car. She wore an apron over a pink polka-dot summer dress and she descended the steps towards him in a pleasant little haze of flour, like she’d just dropped out of the clouds.

     “Theo!” she cried happily, spreading her arms wide.

     “Hey, Aunt Noelle,” Theo said uncertainly, dropping his bag.

     “It’s so good to see you again.”

     Aunt Noelle - his mother’s older, plumper sister - swept him into a tight bear hug. Theo felt his lungs compress. “You too,” he wheezed.

     She released him, still beaming, looking him up and down.

     “My, how you’ve grown!” she exclaimed. “You must be at least a foot taller than last time I saw you. And so handsome now!”

     “Yeah, he was a bit of an uggo before, wasn’t he?” smirked Tiffany.

     Aunt Noelle shot her a look. “You got there late, didn’t you? Was she late picking you up, Theo?”

     “Um, not really,” Theo lied.

     “I knew you’d be late, Tiffany!” Aunt Noelle snapped. Tiffany rolled her eyes, sauntering towards the house.

     “Is that Mr Islander?”

     A man was coming towards them now. Theo hadn’t spotted him past Aunt Noelle, who was still scolding Tiffany. He wore a checked shirt and faded jeans. His once-blond hair was now mostly gray, and he still had the bushiest eyebrows Theo had ever seen.

     “Why, I believe it is,” said Uncle Kurt, answering his own question. He extended a hairy hand and Theo took it, barely suppressing a gasp as his fingers were mashed together. He’d forgotten how strong Uncle Kurt was. “Good to see you again, nephew.”

     “Likewise,” Theo managed, thinking I can’t feel my hand.

     Uncle Kurt chuckled. “Grab that bag of yours and let’s go inside. Dinner’s almost ready.” He finally let go; Theo felt blood rush back into his fingers. “Oh, and you remember your cousin Alex? What am I saying, of course you do.”

     His uncle turned back to the house, stepping past a girl who’d followed him from the house but had hung back during the introductions. She was a couple of inches shorter than Theo, with a shock of white-blonde hair and deep blue eyes that darted back and forth between him and the ground. She wore a red t-shirt emblazoned with a Captain America logo, denim shorts, and tattered sneakers tied with clean new laces. She wrung her hands nervously and said, “Hi, Theo.”

     “Hey, Alex.”

     For a split second, he thought she was going to either hug him or shake his hand, and he wasn’t sure which would’ve been more awkward. Instead, she pointed at his bag and said, “Do you, um… need help with that?”

     “Oh. No, I’m good,” he replied, stooping to pick it up.

     “Ok. Come on, then.”

     Alex Oakwood spun on her heel and headed for the house, and Theo followed.

---